Category: Fashion

Burger King’s Chicken Permission Sandwich Was Okay

matt bought a chicken permission sandwich on a whim today after seeing it advertised on television a single time. Well played, Burger King marketing team.

I can’t clearly remember the last time I went to Burger King. I’m pretty certain it was one morning, finishing up a late-night shift at a hotel, I went to a Burger King for some of their trademarked soggy hashbrowns and a world-famous croissan’wich. This time, I saw an advertisement while staying at a hotel, and decided that it would be my meal for the very next day. My girlfriend made me go through the drive-thru, even though I secretly didn’t want to drive and eat at the same time. I figured it would save an us argument future down the road  (boy was I wrong).

I had to wait an inordinate amount of time for a “fast food” sandwich. In what I have found to be commonplace in America, my car was told to pull around front to wait for the sandwich as they were waiting on chicken patties to be cooked and meticulously placed on a bun with permission cheese melted on top. I guess they weren’t actually ready for someone to order something they’re advertising on their windows. After about ten minutes I haughtily headed inside to yell at a manager – just as the cashier was leaving with my sandwiches to the car.

The genesis of an argument. Pictured: an angry stubborn man and a hungry girl. Also did you know this place had Chicken Nuggets for a buck fifty? Bought me one of them bad boys mmmmm chicken nuggers

The sandwich itself was rather bland. It was pretty much what I expected: marinara sauce from a can with a few shavings of permission cheese and one of their usual crispy chicken patties on a remarkably untoasted bun. The nature of the chicken permission sandwich dictates that it will get soggy approximately five seconds before the bread is even involved. The breading on the chicken will fall off and the bun will be mostly marinara before you unwrap the thing. Despite its misgivings, a good chicken permission sandwich gets me watering at the mouth and hurtin’ at the stomach.Continue reading “Burger King’s Chicken Permission Sandwich Was Okay” »

Kith x Nike Pop-Up Pickups

As much as I love New York City Sneaker Boutique Kith, I rarely keep up with the various drops and collabs that they’re always up to, so if I find something cool there, it’s usually just by chance. Last time I stopped by KITH Manhattan, I was one day early to the Kith x Colette drops. Had I timed it properly, I would have no doubt dropped however much it takes to look like Fabolous:

But yesterday, I managed to stumble upon a Kith x Nike Olympic inspired pop-up shop. The presentation of the place was pretty incredible, with iconic shoes like Michael Johnson’s famous golden spikes from the 1996 Summer Olympics on display.

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Yeezy Adidas Slides???

For not actually being a real product, these are pretty damn sweet looking.

The world of fake merchandise from China is rampant, and you can easily cop yourself a pair of Yeezys or some Balmain gear for a fraction of a price from DHgate or Aliexpress. I don’t really recommend doing it, and you’ll deserve your fuckboi title for wearing anything from there, but these were too intriguing to pass up on.

I reviewed them on Reddit and I’m far too lazy to reword it so this is what I had to say:

I was about to buy a pair of legit adidas slides, but then I remembered seeing a pic of these while browsing dhgate a while ago. My site in particular said only one person had ordered these before. Checked youtube/here and didn’t find anything so I thought I’d check them out since they looked kinda nice.

Of course there’s no real Yeezy Slides, so there’s not much to compare it to. Obviously anybody who knows anything about Yeezys will know they are fake, but they still look really sweet. The boost doesn’t look great but AFAIK everything else does.

On feet, it feels like they might break pretty easily. The upper material doesn’t have a lot of give and you can tell it wasn’t designed to be on a flip flop.

Overall they look great, but long-term wearability might be an issue, and if you’re worried about being called out over wearing a rep of something that doesn’t exist, then you definitely shouldn’t get these lol.

I’m not gonna post a link where to get these, but you can search “Yeezy Slide” on dhgate and the ones that I ordered should come up.

 

Anyway, I did a corny unboxing video for these and you can get an even better look at them here:

Losing the Gapcore Shorts + HUF Haul

Although I own tops from just about every major streetwear label, I’ve always skimped out on paying for shorts. I always figured, If I’m dressing to impress, I’m probably not even going to be wearing shorts, right? Wrong.

In the past I have opted for mostly plain Mossimo khaki/flat front shorts. (For the blissfully ignorant, Mossimo is the brand that encompasses like, 80% of the clothing sold at Targét.) My original attitude was that as long as I’m not wearing cargoes and keeping the colors basic, I should be okay. And I probably was, but certainly not for the obnoxious streetwear kid I aspire to be.

Continue reading “Losing the Gapcore Shorts + HUF Haul” »

Glow-In-The-Dark Shoes Need To Die

I’m usually not one to obsess over limited release shoes. Especially those that are egregiously expensive and released in artificially low quantities. It’s a terrible practice that fuccboi culture has been eating up. It’s really not cool that the shoes will start selling on ebay for a 400% markup, just moments after the initial release. Adidas is aware that they didn’t produce enough shoes if they sold out in under a minute.  However, heat is heat, and the recent Yeezy 750 Grey/Gum release looked super clean. I loaded up my Adidas app for the first time ever in hopes to reserve them. I took the L, like thousands of others but am I really that upset?

Gag.

Although the shoes look fantastic, they just HAD to include a gimmick, and that’s the reintroduction of glow-in-the-dark soles. We should have been done with these back when Kanye was back with Nike. He even said that he was adamant about leaving his Nike creations in the past. You’ve heard Facts, right? We can almost all agree that the Adidas Yeezys have been way nicer and have had significantly more hype and that could have been done by leaving the shoes clean.

Lets be honest, you’d look like a clown with these at night. The last thing I’d want to be doing is wearing these in the club and shouting out “I’m a fuccboi with no taste who probably overpaid a reseller for this crap.” This would be a daytime-only fit for me for sure.

These are $350 retail exclusive luxury sneakers. Not fucking LA Gears. They’re fine without the gimmicks. As a young adult, do you really want to be wearing something your 6-year-old velcro-step-activated-light wearing self would’ve liked?

I’ll pass on this, thanks.

PSA: Don’t Wear Mom Jeans

Stop trying to make mom jeans happen. It’s not going to happen.

Alright, I get it. Some of you are too fat to wear skinny jeans, but no amount of complaining about how overly tight they are and pretending that they aren’t stylish is going to make them go away. They’re pervasive in all sorts of social niches from hipster to hypebeast. You don’t look at your favorite celebrities on billboard ads to see them shirtless with their lower half covered by relaxed fit jeans like the ones you wear when you eat donuts on the couch watching The O’Reilly Factor. Nah, they’re wearing slim fit at the baggiest.

You can’t claim to know anything about fashion and wear relaxed fit jeans. There’s nothing “relaxed” about fashion in the first place. Comfort is often a necessary sacrifice for beauty, like how getting your sockless feet cut up in a brand new pair of Sperry Topsiders is a rite of passage for both yourself and the shoe. Another example that I shouldn’t even have to explain, boot cut jeans are meant to be worn with BOOTS. If you’re not wearing boots, DON’T WEAR THOSE!!!! It’s in the name, it should be extremely simple to figure out.

Unless you’re like morbidly obese, you WILL fit into a pair of straight or slim fit jeans from a good brand, and it will look several orders of magnitude better than the mom jeans that you found on the discount rack at Wal-Mart. Ok sure, you lost some breathing room but please, it’s not anywhere close to how bad wearing heels is, but at least most girls take that in stride and know that it makes them look good.

Even though various rap songs would tell you that skinny jeans are without a doubt the best, in reality the ideal cut of jeans does depend on your body type. But NOBODY has a body like mom jeans are designed. Nobody. So step outside of your comfort zone (walmart) and find a damn pair of good fitting jeans if you don’t want to be laughed at in public by people who actually know how to dress.